Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright and Sporting Wood.

The high and mighty are going down like bowling pins on the pro tour. Al Gored (as he will hereafter be known) had to cancel out of his Copenhagen dog and pony show because of a serious case of red ass, compounded by roses blooming in his other cheeks. Big Al Gored wound up on the wrong end of the stampeding bull of destiny. You have my sympathies Al. We’re all waiting for your Cardinal Woolsey speech.

For awhile you couldn’t shake a bush without discovering a Republican with a young boy or a Democrat with a black stocking hooker. These kinds of events seem to have their own inner clock; karma acting as a harvesting combine. In the spring you plant your seeds of greed, lust and hubris and come the fall you’re ready to bring it in to the barn where, in the darkness of the night, little elves make up that sachet for your moments of hindsight; accent on hind.

As is typical with rats deserting sinking ships, our formerly respected climate scientists are pointing at each other and saying, “He did it and I don’t know nothing about nothing.” There’s a hurricane of outrage and censure brewing off the shores of the island where Dr. Moreau’s, Juju Weather Institute is based. It’s a big one and the silence of the whores at the S&MSM is deafening. Usually they’re squealing like butchered hogs as they fake it for the client but now it reminds me of that old joke; A Frenchman is walking along a beach near St. Tropez. He spots a beautiful woman being tossed back and forth in the soft white water of the surf. He goes over to her and begins speaking to her, caressing her and then, soon after, making love to her. A gendarme shows up with a small crowd of people and exclaims, “Alor Monsieur, can you not ze zat zis woman is dead?” The Frenchman looks up and replies, “Oh pardonez moi, I sought she was American.”

Now that I think about it, I’m not sure how relevant that joke is but hey, poetic license and all that.

The explosive nature of this climate scam is epic. It’s off the charts and the silence of the S&MSM is, against all the laws of physics, acting as an amplifier. This one has legs, not smooth and shaved, velveteen columns from the pipe organ of Heaven but Kenyan, long distance running legs. It’s the Energizer Bunny of scandals and it couldn’t happen to a nicer bunch of guys. Well, it could and it will. The bankers are feeling the heat too, now that it’s been established that they are even more crooked than we always knew them to be. The hard guys at that Goldman Sachs, mob operation are packing gats. Let’s hope they’ve got good reason to.

The politicians are getting hammered for all kinds of things and some of them are making it easy, like Barbara Boxcutter, as she rises to the defense of her bank account connection to global warming. She’s living proof that when you mess with their money they will expose themselves as the complete degenerates that they are. She wrote a book called “Blind Trust”. You can’t make this shit up. Truth is definitely stranger than fiction and a lot more ironic.

So now we’ve got Tiger Woods who appears to have had a lot of his irons in the fire. Apparently he was using his putter in the sand and honey trap. Was he not paying attention? What is it with celebrities of all professions that they invariably pick a particular kind of woman who might as well be called, Helen Wheels? I saw a picture of this Rachel Uchitel and she is definitely headed for Wildenstein Country in a few years. What internet escort site did Tiger find her on? It wasn’t necessary. He only had to go to Vegas. They’ve all got a home office there. Why do so many celebrities go to Vegas? They get treated like Gods. No where else on Earth can they have just about everything for free for only showing up. I believe Vegas is now stealing water as far north as Canada. That’s what I call slant drilling. Israel could learn a few things from Vegas and it would be that much closer to being the Hollywood Holy Land in fact.

I don’t understand people like Tiger Woods. Why not just stay single? Why buy a cow when milk’s ten cents a glass? (Sorry about that. I got possessed for a moment) If you’re not going to stay single then maybe a little discretion and discrimination might come in handy. I don’t understand who they risk it all for either. When I saw the women that Bill Clinton was messing around with, I said to myself, “I do much better than that on a bad night and I’m not the president of the United States. There are fairy tale princesses and elf maidens out there. Why do they always go for the sleaze? There’s some kind of Venus Fly Trap thing going on or maybe it’s that old black magic. To top it off, Tiger’s wife is far more beautiful than any of these other women. You can’t say, “but she’s American”, because they all are.

When you’re a big celebrity you’re kind of screwed anyway. You seldom meet real people and you’re in a spiritual k-hole to boot. You often can’t enjoy the more rarefied aspects of engagement because money is a kind of shit and it attracts a crowd of flies. You’ve got to be some kind of a fool to pursue fame. Some would say it was thrust upon them but they asked for it at some point. If you are going to be famous you should be cool famous like Willie Nelson; except when Willie got caught cheating one time, his wife tied him up in a bed sheet while he was sleeping and beat the crap out of him. Then there’s the Columbian solution and the Crazy Glue payback. It doesn’t seem worth it to me.

I wouldn’t be in a relationship where I couldn’t do as I pleased because life throws all kinds of things at you and sometimes it is inescapable karma. I’m not tempted though. That kind of just died, for which I am mucho grateful. So Tiger apparently gives this standup girl (that’s definitely the wrong term) something like a million bucks not to talk but now all kinds of people have the text messages and are shopping them around. Now how did they get those? That climate expose artiste has been working over time.

I want to mention something that I’ve alluded to before. This kind of thing is going to become exponential. It’s going to really get going shortly and what we see now will be nothing by comparison. People are going to get nailed right and left. It’s going to be 24 hour, balls to the walls. It’s funny that people don’t see this. It’s happening all over place with a lot more pervasiveness than that phony flu epidemic; of course, they haven’t released the real ones yet, nor have they activated the nano-bots in the vaccine. Still, people go right on doing what they are doing and in some cases calling attention to it.

I know that their arrogance is off the charts. It’s why they put a black man with the name Barrack Hussein Obama (rhymes with Osama) in the White House; just to show you that they could. They’re having a big yuck up in the backrooms but it’s not a deep release in the gut laughter because there’s a cold wind blowing in from the east and they can feel it but still they continue.

They are truly being driven mad as the preface to destruction. All of this is happening, as the curtains are being lifted, and they go right on as if the curtain were stapled to the floor. They’re like some guy in one of those hospital gowns with the open back, out on the town and dreaming that he’s wearing a tux. There’s smoke on the waters of the mind and they can’t see where they’re going which, to them, means they’re not going fast enough.

It’s going to cost Tiger a bundle but that doesn’t mean anything at all. He can go right on making more money for as long as he can knock that little ball around the green graveyards of the material world. He’s going to take a hit from the sponsors though and the tarnish is not going to fade. Things like this matter in that world even though they are all hypocrites and clowns. Surely if you’ve going to behave like this you should move to Europe. No one pays any attention to that sort of thing over here, except in England.

Polanski’s in his chalet in Gstaad; no doubt he’s ordering off the menu at this very moment from the local boarding school. Tiger’s trying to figure out what went wrong and whose fault that might be. The new lineup is headed for the world runway as the next series of falls are set up on the drawing board and scheduled for their moment in the lights …and god bless whoever blew the whistle on those scientists. There ought to be a Nobel Prize for that. I have to admit that made me feel pretty good and that feeling does not appear to be going away any time soon.

Bad Dogs and Barbed Wire

The New Shangri-La


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